whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
