Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
you made out with another girl for some wings
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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