it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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