does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
