Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
