Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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