He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
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