best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
