you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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