I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
