hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
i need some magic done to my vagina
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
