What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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