Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize