My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Randomize
