oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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