youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
