Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Randomize
