another moral hangover. fuck.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
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