Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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