Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
