I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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