I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
