Three words: puerto rican gang bang
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
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