He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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