So drunk, too bad you don't want this
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
