Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
