you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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