Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
