It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
