okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
