great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
you will always have a special place in my vag
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Randomize
