Please don't use social media to get back at me.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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