Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
