her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
