I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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