Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
