Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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