ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
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