love makes seman taste better
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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