Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
