If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
he puts the penis in happiness.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
