Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
