I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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