Christians are straight up FREAKS
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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