she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
