Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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