Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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