love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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