How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
