I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
