tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
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worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
