i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
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